Recent shoots

I enjoy photography. I really do. It's my creative outlet. I'm always caught between just wanting to do it for the love of it and making a legitimate business out of it. My best shoots tend to be those I do out of service or because I have an idea and want to let my creative juices flow. Dealing with the public annoys me-though a few families that I have met through referrals have become very good friends, and I love hearing peoples stories and capturing their personalities for what I hope will be their future posterity. I also love earning money to support my interest.

I have a lot to learn...and I'm comfortable with that. I love learning. In my hopes of learning more and establishing a business model I had signed up for a photography workshop in Colorado Springs hosted by Kelli France of France Photography. I stumbled across her site a couple years ago. I really like her work-but more than that I really like her business-I think she has done amazing things. She gives gifts to her clients, is amazing at presentation and organization. I was really excited to go...I bought my plane ticket...and put the deposit down... As the date approached the remainder of $900 began to be very daunting. A wedding I had scheduled this month was called off and that was going to cover half of the workshop fee. I felt this nagging inside me-you can't go. I could go...I could easily come up with the $$ and get reward points at the same time for using my AMEX... No. I'll lose the deposit, I know I won't get my airfare back. Hmmmm.... Then I received a phone call. It was the travel coordinator from Francipants Academy. They had booked the workshop full and their was another photographer who they were trying to fit in. She asked if I would mind sharing my room with a third attendee-she was willing to put an air mattress on the floor. This was my opportunity. I had a choice to make now. I explained my situation and asked since they were booked full if I could get a refund on my deposit then the other photographer could have my place.

It all worked out besides the $100 I spent on the non refundable ticket. Better to lose $100 than spend $1400 you don't have. Right? Though I felt a sense of relief and peace after the phone call-I still shed a couple tears out of disappointment.

I had said from the beginning I would not take money from our family budget and I would not go into debt to start a business. So there it is. It is what it is.

8 Weeks To A Better Me

I have had such a difficult time reaching some of my goals lately. I can see the woman I want to become just beyond the horizon. I really like her. I would prefer to reach her while I'm still relatively young, and have time and good health on my side. While my children are home watching my example.

This has been nagging at me for sometime now. I need to do more service, I need to study the scriptures with more purpose and diligence, I need to take better care of myself physically. Funny that even though I have a great desire for this-my actual daily motivation and energy for these things has just been puttering out. Then these two sisters from my ward put together this opportunity- http://8weekstoabetteryou.blogspot.com/. It was just the little push of accountability and reward I needed. I am so excited and ready to go.

I know this isn't just for me-but I feel the Saviors love for me through this act of service from these two sisters. I feel like he knew what I needed and it was provided. I am so grateful for Heavenly Fathers love. GAME ON!! See you on the horizon...

Current Events

I decided it was time I started adding in my thoughts on current events. I print this blog out as a journal and I'd like to look back and have my posterity look back and see what some of the issues were of this time and what my thoughts on them were. So the next few entries will be on events that are weighing on my heart right now. I won't be offended if you leave a comment contrasting to my opinion. I appreciate different lights being shed on the subject. Unless I'm having one of those days..then I will probably curse your name for at least 24 hrs or maybe 48 then I will be over it.

Regarding the controversial Mosque in lower Manhattan-


My personal feelings without looking into the subject were these: If it's private land it's private land-if it is zoned for a church/community center there should be no prejudice. As per the Newt Gingrich article stating that we don't see the Middle East allowing Christian churches etc... Well we are NOT the Middle East and we don't dictate or inhibit religion. I would like to think that we as Latter Day Saints will never undergo the persecution that was so prevalent at the hands of "Christians" during the early stages of the church, and our ability to build chapels and temples will never be infringed upon. I love the United States of America. I love that I have the freedom to worship. I also loved this article. http://lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/respect-for-diversity-of-faiths.

In many ways I feel the liberties we hold so dear are repeatedly mocked. Whether it's through the general good will of America being taken advantage of or our free speech being thrown back in our faces by anti-american slurs filled with hate. Should we stop being benevolent? Should we limit those freedoms to those who believe as we do. By doing that "they",being the countless terror organiztions, will have won, Satan will have swayed us. That reminds me a little of the impact I felt during President Uchtdorfs conference talk concerning not judging others reasons behind seeking out the church. Maybe we are being mocked and used-maybe those hearts will still be softened.


I thought this was an interesting article from Fox News
http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2010/08/17/kt-mcfarland-ground-zero-mosque-god-september-obama-imam-feisal/

"So while some see a mosque near Ground Zero as a commemoration for innocents who died; others could claim it as the place where Islamic terrorists triumphed. The Ground Zero mosque will have an athletic facilities and youth outreach programs, What guarantees do we have that it will never be used, officially or secretly, as a recruitment station for terrorists; that jihadists won’t lurk in the background of its athletic facilities and youth center recruiting potential suicide bombers? "

I know for a fact that a local mosque here in Tucson has had terrorist ties. Jihad has been setting up camp and recruiting for decades. Publicly funded charter schools are used to further Islamic and sometime radical Islamic agendas. Even our very own Sonoran Science Academy. If you wanted to look into it google Daisy Education Corporation. So our American tax dollars are going to further the cause of a Islamic and Turkish political agenda? That could be maddening if you think about it long enough. What are we going to do about it. Are we going to let them make fools out of us? Are we going allow these schools to exist? If we limit our tax dollars to those schools we must take them away from all charter schools. Some would say-let education go completely private-no public education. I'm not on board with that- yet. I was talking with the wife of our Bishop that has sent one of their daughters to Sonoran. She volunteered her feelings about her daughter having to take Turkish and having Islamic teachers. She said that maybe someday in her daughters future she will be a missionary in that region. Hmmm, I hadn't thought of that. But it did make me think after she had said it.

After looking into the Park Ave Mosque-this is what I found- 1. It's blocks away from ground zero. 2. It not a Mosque it's an Islamic community center with a prayer room included. 3. I was curious about how many Muslims dies during 911 and found that many including Muslim EMT's Paramedics and Firefighters died in rescue attempts and their families pray daily at the site. I would hope no one would look at them with disgust or treat them with unkindness. I like to think (and I don't care if it's being naive) that through the goodwill of our country, through our example of love the hearts of the world will be touched and true Christianity will be spread. I couldn't believe it when I heard The First Presidency had been in a type of negotiation with China. How wonderful for the people of that country. http://www.ldschurchnews.com/articles/59807/China-official-looking-to-improve-relations-with-Church.html

This is an exciting time to live. If we truly believe that the Gospel will be shared throughout all nations before the second coming of Christ we have to know that it will only be done not by force but by gaining respect and trust through kindness and diplomacy. Pitching a fit over an Islamic community center, crazy people burning sacred books of other peoples faiths paints a very poor picture of Christianity and of Americans. We are great. We are better than that. I'm getting really tired of the media showcasing these things rather than all the wonderful things our country does and is doing on a national and worlwide level. I am thankful to have the foundation of our countries inspired constitution and the Gospel of Jesus Christ in times where my emotions run high.

Favorite Moments Of The Past Two Weeks.

Kat, Madison and Kage

Danette playing with all her nieces and nephews.

The Fam

The Leeson Baby

Mt. Lemmon

Judy and Marlin had their 50th wedding anniversary. I think they had a great time celebrating with the their family and friends. It's hard to take pictures when it's your family and your trying to visit and tend to your baby but I managed to get a few pics and luckily there were willing guests to help out. Danette did an outstanding job-and I know the grand kids especially were given so many wonderful memories to take home.

I got to photograph another beautiful baby!

We were able to take a Saturday and go hike on Mt. Lemmon. We took the Meadow Loop trail that hooks onto the Mt. Lemmon trail. It was so beautiful. We are going to make effort to hike more often as a family.

It's no fun seeing things from so many different angles.

I'm hoping at some point I'll stop second guessing all of my feelings, all of my ideas, all my decisions. I feel like it's a weak approach to life. Stand firm and steadfast-don't waiver in indecisiveness. In all fairness to myself I do stand firm in a few things. The Gospel of Jesus Christ my membership in His church-my testimony. I stand firm in my marriage, and that every time I have followed the council of the still small voice of the spirit the blessings and course that my life has taken has led only to happiness and safety. With that being said-sometimes I feel like I waiver waiver waiver in all my little decisions in life. Should I put forth more effort in getting the kids into organized sports...should I put them into a more academically oriented school. Should we buy land to build on later-should we just stay in this house and pay it off to have an easier retirement property to care for. How important is a pool and basketball court? Long hair or short hair? Light cabinets or dark cabinets? Or should I care at all. Sometimes my mind feels so muddled with the unimportants in life.

This is what I know right now.

The kids schools.

I LOVE their teachers. Hannah hit the school year running-Geometry, Book Reports, AZ History. I am a happy camper. Noah's teacher has a room decorated in red white and blue with the Constitution and Declaration of Independence proudly displayed. This makes me happy. The kids are happy, I am happy.

Extra curricular activities

Hannah-Achievement day girls, School Choir, Jump Rope Team, Piano, Track

Noah-Scouts, Jump Rope Team, Piano- and reading reading reading reading and more reading.

and swim team in the summer.

They both started piano up again. Noah loves it. He gets real joy out of his ability in that area.

We asked Noah about football-he hesitated then replied if we wanted him to play he would try it out. We missed the deadline and he showed ZERO disappointment. Jared would like to see him play and enjoys the sport. I'm not an organized sports enthusiast-but can appreciate what it can offer. BUT it is really EXPENSIVE. So do we cough up the cash to see if he really will like it? Give up EVERY Saturday and 3 evenings a week for 3-4 months. UGH....

See-this is where I waiver. This past Saturday we took the kids to Mt. Lemmon for a hike. They loved it. Jared and I loved it. Noah wanted to climb everything. We stopped at Windy Point and showed the kids where we used to play. I began to fantasize about bringing the kids up at sunrise and playing on the rocks all morning. Something our whole family would love-something that would bind us even closer together. Mmmm that makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside.

I'm not ready for Noah to be gone until 8:30-9:00pm almost every night. Having to eat on the run-it's hard enough with Jared's schedule. That thought makes me FROWN. So what is their to waiver about-what is the problem? Oh....there is no problem...TIME TO MOVE ON.

Well hold on....Am I being selfish-am I somehow pushing my own agenda-my own desires...

I AM THE MOTHER-it's my job to push an agenda. Right? Well-yes and no.

See, See what I have to put up with...ridiculous.