Well, we're not pregnant anymore. Thursday was a hard and disappointing day, I'll leave it at that. As disappointed as we all are, the past couple days have brought quite a bit of joy to all of us. Jared is back on surgery once a week. The surgeon he is working with is a very proactive teacher. Jared was handed the scalpel and told-cut. As you can imagine he had a great start to his Friday. It was fun to hear him so excited. Later that evening he met up with Noah at the Fathers and Son camp out. They had a blast, rockets, paintball and quads. Oh My! He didn't bring the camera...so no pictures. Hannah was my assistant during an evening photo shoot and did a marvelous job portraying dolphins and butterfly's behind me to get the giggles and attention of two little girls. After the shoot we went out to dinner together feasted on chicken Parmesan and sucked down a very yummy orange Italian soda. We woke up this morning at 5:00 and drove down to Tubac for another photoshoot at a Golf Resort out there. Golf Resort does not accurately describe this property. Think picturesque Spanish Colonial Village with fountains, flowers, huge trees,(weeping willows, cotton woods...)The Golf course was rolling hills with cows and their calf's laying around or snacking on the beautiful, lush grass that made up the course. Did I mention the ponds? Hannah again was a great assistant. After the shoot we explored the town of Tubac together. We had breakfast and waited for the shops to open. Then we had fun looking through all the jewelry and art galleries. In one shop Hannah was given a really cute glass pendant. It has a purple flower blown into the glass. I'll have to get a picture of it. She could have stayed there all day. Jewelry and art galleries-need I say more. We had a terrific Mother Daughter day together. I love these moments we get to share together. It was a pretty special day. Jared and Noah brought home flowers, then we all got ready and went to a family party hosted by the dentists family who is responsible for all the photography work I've been getting. In fact the mornings shoot was of one of his office staff and her family. We're sad not to be expecting anymore and it's hard not to feel a little foolish for announcing it so early in the first place. It was nice to feel that joy and excitement though and wonderful seeing how much Hannah and Noah were excited. They have taken the news in stride-I'm very grateful for that. Hopefully there is nothing wrong and we'll have news to share again in the months ahead. More time to prepare I suppose.
Love, Mel
Love, Mel
5 comments:
Melanie, I am so sorry. You have a great attitude and faith. I hope you're able to have a baby soon. So sorry about the disapointment. We love you.
Melanie, I'm sorry for your loss. It's a hard thing to go through. When I lost a pregnancy early on the thought that gave me the most comfort was that maybe that was all the body that little spirit needed and if so then I was very greatful to have been able to provide it.
I've enjoyed your blog, I've been lurking for a while but have never posted a comment. I found you through Alisa. I don't know if you remember me, we were in the Butterfield ward and did preschool with a group of moms there.
I am very sorry. I hope you are feeling well or at least soon.
Love, Linette
I am so sorry, Mel. Please don't feel foolish for sharing the excitment or the disappointment, that is what family and friends are for.
That golf resort was beautiful! That was the perfect thing to do after your disappointing day. It is like the rainbow after the storm...just keep looking for that rainbow!
I wish there was something we could do, just know that we love you and we will keep you in our prayers. I am sure that all will be well...
Thank you for your thoughts. I really appreciate them. Of course I remember you Kathy! Hope your family is doing well. The most difficult part for me is getting over the fear. The past five years just havn't felt right to us. I don't know why-I analyzed it over and over. For awhile I felt like my body was a little off kilter-Now I feel like everything is okay. There is still that part of me that thinks what if...There can be a million what if's. Isn't that where faith comes in? That's when I take a deep breath, pray and wait for the comfort of the Holy Ghost to set in. Everything will be okay. Jared and I both feel like it's time. I can almost picture our babies. I fantasize about ultrasound appointments. I've waited for awhile for those feelings to return. I am grateful for those feelings. Maybe it's just that I have realized this is really my last opportunity to experience having babies again. (I am turning 32 in June):). Maybe it's really divine inspiration. Or a little of both. At any rate, we will keep trying. Writing for me is a way to work through my thoughts. So I write more that I probably should-share more than I probably should, so thanks for bearing with me. :) and thank you for your kind words of support.
-Mel
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